Tamil Marriages – a Simple & Beautiful Affair

Tamils believe in simple living and high thinking andwith a new sari by her would be in laws. A garland
their marriages are also a simple affair. Tamilof flowers is tied around her waist and aarti is
weddings are usually attended by near and dearalso performed for her.
ones. Hence their weddings are not necessarily 
extravagant affairs. Tamils consider matrimonyReading of Lagna Pathirigai
very auspicious, so, they are very cautious at 
every step. Tamil marriages involve many ritualsThe priest formally reads out the wedding
and customs like all other Indian marriages andinvitation. Details on three generations of the boy
matrimonials. The date for the wedding is usuallyand the girl and other information on the
fixed after consulting the Hindu calendar.muhurtam is announced. This is followed by an
According to the Tamil calendar, the months ofelaborate dinner.
Aashad (July 15th to August 15th), Bhadrapad 
(September 15th to October 15th) and ShunyaWedding rituals and ceremonies:
(December 15th to January 15th) are considered 
inauspicious for weddings and hence, TamilianMangala Snaanam
weddings are not held in these months. 
 The mangala snaanam is the auspicious bath that
Before the wedding celebrations:the bride and groom must have in their
 respective homes on the dawn of their wedding
Panda Kaal Muhurthamday. Before the bath they are anointed with
 some oil and a tilak of haldi-kumkum.
To ensure that the wedding preparations and 
wedding pass off successfully, it is customary toKashi Yatra
invoke the blessings of the family deity. The 
family of the bride and the groom pray to theIt is a very dramatic ritual and adds humor to the
deity who is personified by a bamboo pole. Moreoccasion. After the mangala snaanam, the groom
often than not, this ritual is performed a daypretends to leave for Kashi to devote himself to
before the wedding.God and a life of prayer. He enacts as if he is not
 interested in becoming a householder. Then the
Receiving the Groomgirl's father intervenes and requests him to accept
 his daughter as his Jeevansathi (life partner).The
When the groom and his family visit the weddinggroom changes his mind and returns to the pandal
hall a day before the marriage, they arewhere he is received by the bride.
welcomed with a tray containing offerings of 
flowers, paan supari, fruits and mishri. Rose waterExchange of Garlands
is sprinkled on the groom. A senior female 
member of the Tamil bride's family performs aartiThis ceremony is full of excitement. The bride and
and welcomes them. To ward off evil spirits, it isthe groom exchange garlands thrice and are
customary to break a coconut to the ground.teased by their relatives. For instance, they pull
 the girl away when the boy reaches forward to
Pallikai Thellichalbe garlanded by her, and vice versa. The bride
 and the groom's uncles have to lift them.
This ceremony is also performed a day before 
the wedding. In this, clay pots are filled with grains.Kanyadaanam
Married women from the bride’s and 
groom’s side sprinkle water on the pots filledThe groom is welcomed by bride’s father to
with nine different varieties of grain. On thethe mandapam (place where the wedding rituals
wedding day when the grains sprout, these potsare carried out). The bride's mother applies kajal in
are immersed in a pond so that the fish in thethe groom's eyes and father washes his feet.
pond may feed on the grains and give theirThrough this gesture the father conveys that
blessings the newly-weds.that the boy is a personification of Lord Vishnu
 and believes that he will take care of his daughter.
NaandiThe father and bride offer the coconut to the
 groom while the bride's mother pours water over
During this ceremony, some Brahmins are invitedthe coconut which symbolises the 'giving away of
to represent the souls of the ancestors of thetheir daughter.' Then the groom's parents gift the
bride and the groom. They are presented somebride a nine-yard sari and a blouse to be worn for
sweets and gifts and the families seek theirnext moment, the auspicious occasion of tying
blessings before beginning the marriagethe mangasultra
proceedings. 
 Muhurtum
Jaanavaasam 
 The priest and relatives bless the mangalsutra or
These days, people hardly practise this custom.sacred thread and then the groom ties it around
The groom is escorted to the wedding venue bythe neck of his bride with two knots. His sister
a large and joyous procession of family andties the third knot much to the jubilation of
friends. Professional musicians are invited toeveryone accompanied by the drums of the
accompany the procession and to play traditionalmelam. These three knots symbolise the marriage
wedding music. At times there are also fireworksof the mind, spirit and body.
to celebrate the occasion. Then the groom is 
welcomed in the wedding hall after the girl'sSaptapadi
brother garlands and receives him. 
 The groom takes the right hand of the bride in his
Nicchiyadharathamleft hand and leads her around the sacred fire
 seven times. Each round is begun by the bride
In the presence of the officiating priest, theonly after touching the grinding stone. This signifies
bride's parents perform Ganesh Pooja. The brideher hope of a steadfast and forever union.
is also present during the ceremony. She is gifted